Reflections From The Rabbit Hole

Reflections From The Rabbit Hole

Saturday, May 27, 2017

With broken wings, I try to fly.
I try and I try.
But impossible to do,
So I can't reach the sky.

With heavy heart,
I try to start
Every day
With a positive play
On what lies ahead.

But I'm never sure
Of what's pure
Or stained with
Past deeds I cannot cure.

God tells me to trust
Him, but I cannot just
Follow Him
With reckless abandon =
I need a strong faith to stand on,
But at times that fails me.

People tell me to believe
And I can achieve
What goals I want to find
But they don't know what kind
Of thoughts run through my broken mind.

Perhaps my broken mind is
My broken wings,
But they are things
That cannot be repaired
And that leaves me with a
Scared feeling of facing my own mortality.

I'm a spiritual being,
Doing my own thing
And believing in my own destiny.
My broken wings will not 
Let me be free.

Day to day
I face my demons
But they are constantly
To drag me down the
Rabbit Hole
Where my soul
Is battered by my
Reckless mind
And leaves me in
A state of
Constant motion
That plays in a loop
Round in round in my head
Today and the days ahead.

The years crept up
On me
Not letting me see
Where I was going
Until it was too late
To change the Fate
Of my life
That was laid out
Before me
On a dusty road
That reminded me
Of where I stood
So many years ago,
Searching for the
Meaning of my life.

My life has been good
And it's been bad,
I've been happy
And I've been said,
But I've never been content
To spend
My time with time
On my idle hands
And that is my downfall
As I struggle
To try to understand
All of it.

Resigned to the cards
I've been dealt
I have felt
Despair and depression
And faced with an impression
Of days to come
When I will eventually
Enter Kingdom Come.

Each step I take,
I falter.
I can't alter
The thoughts going on
In my head,
But instead I try to find peace
In the little things
In life that cease
To change my opinion
Of the dominion of my life.

In the end,
It doesn't matter.
My life has been just a
On the radar of a journey
That forever will be
My legacy to leave behind.

As I wait for the ascent
To Heaven,
I have my faith
To believe in,
But I'm a spiritualist
Not a Bible-believer
And I know there is a receiver
Who will open the Pearly Gates
For me
As I finally learn to fly
With my broken wings.

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